


Partners in crime

by ShariDeschain



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman and Robin (Comics), Catwoman (Comics)
Genre: Bruce's in for a world of troubles, Damian is a cool step-son, Gen, Selina is a cool step-mum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 07:11:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13266351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShariDeschain/pseuds/ShariDeschain
Summary: Selina and Damian bond. Bruce is the victim of his own life choices.





	Partners in crime

The first time it happens they’re sitting together at the new Mayor’s table, waiting for Bruce to finish charm-talking the man into the new Wayne Enterprise’s charity project for the Gotham’s youth.

It's been a long night, full of whispers behind their backs, so when the Mayor’s wife takes advantage of a moment of silence to lean forwards with a shallow smile, enveloping them in a cloud of expensive and way too sweet French perfume, Damian instinctively groans.

“Mrs Wayne, I really appreciate your presence here tonight”, the woman says, all flattery and golden bracelets, and Damian catches Selina’s eyes following the twinkle of a particularly showy diamond on her lobe. “Your dress is simply _exquisite_ , just like your shoes. And you have a beautiful son, too!”

It takes a moment for the words to sink, before Damian tightens his fists around the thin, well-embroidered linen tablecloth. The silence deepens from the other side of the table, and the boy becomes aware of his father’s eyes on him. He doesn’t care. He’s been insulted in lots of ways since he came to Gotham, but never, before tonight, he’s been compared to a women's accessory, like he was a thing made out of vanity, to show off in front of the world. No one has ever dared to say such a thing out loud. Not to his face, at least. And to just _insinuate_ that a common thief like Selina Kyle could be his mother, well. That stings too.

“She’s not my mother, you idiot”, the boy growls under his breath, but loud enough for everyone to hear, and the old woman turns to him for the first time tonight, eyes wide open with surprise at the unexpected rudeness.

Bruce clears his throat warningly and Damian knows that he should apologize right away and hope for just a few nights grounding, but he’s angry, and he didn’t want to be here in the first place, so he ignores his father’s admonishment and opens his mouth to really lay-in on the insults instead, consequences be damned.

But before he can give the woman a taste of all the colorful expressions he’s learned from the streets of Gotham, Selina’s hand comes resting on his fist, lightly squeezing his knuckles before pushing something little and cold into his palm. Damian looks up, confused, but Selina’s still turned towards the other woman and she’s not looking at him.

“He’s not my son, Janet”, she confirms, still holding Damian’s hand in hers, and she’s wearing her utmost serious expression on her face when she continues: “He’s my lover.”

The looks on everybody’s face, his father’s included, would be something worth to laugh about even for Damian’s standards, but the boy’s too stunned to react even with a scoff.

“Wha-”, he starts to say, but then Janet, the Major’s wife, bursts into a shrill laughter, breaking the silence spell for all of them. Soon enough the Mayor’s laughing too, and so are the other guests seated at their table. Even Bruce is smiling at the joke (if only a little uncomfortably), and Selina’s grin is almost dazzling.

“Oh dear”, Janet laughs, the boy's rudeness already forgiven and forgotten, as she recklessly leans too close to Damian’s _not_ -mother. “Why, you’re so funny.”

Selina’s smile widens as she moves her hand away from Damian’s to place it over the woman’s golden bracelets in what should be a friendly gesture.

It’s almost mesmerizing to watch Catwoman work. Her movements are so subtle and delicate and natural that despite being so close, and even with his level of attention, Damian struggles to understand how she manages to make one ring disappear after another without the old woman suspecting or feeling anything.

In less than ten minutes of idle chattering all of the Mayor’s wife jewelry is gone, disappeared into Selina’s hands first and then into her purse. Everything except one of her diamond earrings, still hidden away into Damian’s fist - and how the hell Selina managed to get ahold of it, is beyond him. He’s so impressed, both by her audacity and her skills, that when, by the end of the dinner, Bruce comes up behind them he’s almost surprised by his father’s less-than-pleased look.

But of course the Dark Knight had not forgotten nor forgiven Damian’s outburst, and had definitely noticed Selina’s thievery. Bruce rests an hand on both of their shoulders and leans down with a smile so fake only an upper class gothamite would believe it to be genuine.

“You’re grounded”, he whispers to Damian, all scolding voice and stern look. “No going out with Jon for a week.”

Not that bad of a punishment since Jon’s away on a school trip anyway, Damian thinks, refraining himself from any comment.

“And you”, Bruce turns to Selina with the same frown. “You’re going to leave the content of that purse at the reception.”

He doesn’t say anything about the diamond in Damian’s hand. The boy takes into consideration the very strange and exhilarating idea that his father doesn’t know about it, and one look at Selina’s pleased smile confirms it right away.

“You know she deserves it”, Selina answers, and she’s talking to the both of them, Damian realizes. Because this is the only chance he has to open his hand and show his father the first stolen goods of the night. If he doesn’t do it now, then he’ll have to keep it, and thus become an accomplice and a volgar thief himself.

But Selina’s still smiling at him, like she wants to tell him that the little secret between them is not just a stolen jewel. It’s a trophy. A memento of a shared victory. Perhaps, Damian considers for the first time tonight, Selina didn’t want to be here playing the rich happy family either. Perhaps, she appreciated even less than Damian did, to have him compared to a decoration in her life.

It’s a weird thought. Not an unpleasant one.

Damian scoffs, then looks away from his step-mother and slips the diamond into his pocket.

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr prompt](https://unavenged-robin.tumblr.com/post/169236366428/i-cant-pick-a-specific-prompt-line-but-id-love)  
>  \+ [Bonus](https://unavenged-robin.tumblr.com/post/169238378373/no-okay-but-the-more-i-think-about-it-the-more-i)


End file.
